It is likely that at some point in your life you have watched as a difficult divorce unfolded and people’s lives were affected. Often times it happens that people are angry and frustrated and the process becomes rocky and there is a lot of unnecessary arguing and fighting that has to be dealt with while the divorce is settled. It is hard to watch as a family is split, especially when there are bumps along the way.
Remaining calm is probably one of the last things that you want to do when you are dealing with a difficult divorce situation. However, as we visited with a family law attorney they said that remaining calm and level headed during the process is one of the best ways to see the best results. When the divorcee starts to become frustrated and wanting to hurt the other member of the marriage, things usually do not go as smoothly and unneeded problems occur. According to a divorce attorney, these three things can help you remain calm when you just want to fight back.
Step One
In almost every divorce, there are going to be kids involved. If there are children involved, there are probably also more reason for you to want to fight back when things get ugly. However, having kids involved in the divorce is one of the best ways to remain calm during the situation. You need to turn your attention to your kids and their situation. Children can read into situations. If you focus on your children’s thoughts and what they are seeing and hearing during the process you will be more likely to remain calm and keep your head level on your shoulders throughout the process.
Step Two
While no one wants to have to say they are seeking counseling, it really can be very beneficial. Often times people think that they can get through the divorce and then go to counseling after to learn how to handle their new life situation. However, we would suggest that you hire a great counselor early in the process. Having someone completely outside of the situation to help guide you is one of the best things that you can to do to remain calm. While talking to family and friends is helpful, having someone from the outside who has been trained to counsel is going to be so much more helpful.
Step Three
Have you considered what the bigger picture is going to be? Attorneys are always mentioning that people become so consumer in winning the fight that they forget to think about what the reward is going to be. You need to be sure that you are checking in on what the ultimate goal and vision is from the situation. Do not allow yourself to get caught up in winning the war and not thinking about why you want to win. Constantly remind yourself of the bigger picture down the road and make sure that your actions are actually helping you get there, rather than just making the battle longer and more difficult.